Sunday, March 14, 2010

A Little Sarcasm

Just a few random quotes
from the Sarcastic Society




“Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence.”

“It's always darkest before it turns absolutely pitch black.”

- Paul Newman

“It's a catastrophic success.”

- Stephen Bishop

“I feel so miserable without you, it's almost like having you here.”

- Stephen Bishop

“History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives.”

- Abba Eban

“If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.”

- Groucho Marx


“I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.”

“The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech.”

“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.”

- Oscar Wilde

“Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love, but no friendship.”

- Oscar Wilde

“He was happily married - but his wife wasn't.”

- Victor Borge

“I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.”

- Mark Twain

“Honesty is the best policy -- when there is money in it.”

- Mark Twain

“Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.”

- Mark Twain

“I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure.”

- Clarence Darrow

“A modest little person, with much to be modest about.”

- Winston Churchill

“He is a self-made man and worships his creator.”

“He loves nature in spite of what it did to him.”

- Forrest Tucker

“He has Van Gogh's ear for music.”

- Billy Wilder

“It is not necesssary to understand things in order to argue about them.”

- Caron de Beaumarchais


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